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I came across a set of tweets from Jen Williams this morningâ¦
Jen WilliamsÂ @sennydreadful
I will never understand the urge to harsh a squee.
Jen WilliamsÂ @sennydreadful
you see someone enthusing about something they love. You think, "I know, I'll tell them I think it's shit. They'll appreciate that."
Jen WilliamsÂ @sennydreadful
Or, just don't. People love different things. It's okay.
I agree with completely with whatâs being said here. I do. Iâm not a monster or anything*. But… I think I can understand it. There have been times when I see people raving about a film or book, saying the exact opposite of what I feel, and the urge to kill their squee is powerful.
Just before I go on, when Iâm talking about a âsqueeâ in this post, Iâm referring to a demonstration of love and excitement about something, usually connected to science fiction or fantasy in some way.
I canât speak for squee killers everywhere but for me, encountering a squee I donât understand can be a painful experience, creating a sense of distance between me and person doing the squeeing.
Iâm used to not fitting in. Superheroes and magic and giant robots are enjoying a time of relatively mainstream cool these days but it was not always so. Growing up, I learned to be careful with who I shared my passions with and those friends who also loved things like Star Wars, Babylon 5, Dungeons and Dragons, Amber, Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay and running around the woods in silly costumes were rare jewels indeed.
And with those friends and the wider geek community I have a feeling of belonging that I often donât in the wider world.
Iâm used to people not getting what I love but when those people are in circles that I consider to be âmy communityâ or âmy tribeâ it can be almost unbearable.
Conversely, when people I respect squee about something I think is terrible, itâs also unbearable. I feel like maybe I donât understand them after all, maybe they donât understand me.
Thatâs when the Dark Side become tempting.
Perhaps, it whispers, if you were to point out to them why the thing they love is rubbish, theyâll realise their mistake and then unity will return.
Somehow, their squee makes me feel insecure. And I think thatâs the point of all this. Squee killers are moving from a place of insecurity because itâs rare that they simply offer their opinion with a comment like:
âYes, the effects in Prometheus were excellent, although I must admit I found the representation of the scientists hard to believe and that made it harder for me to suspend disbelief.â
Instead going for something like:
âPrometheus sucks in every way! The plot is rubbish, the characters laughable. And how did she run with that injury? And why didnât she run sideways! Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! And if you think otherwise youâre a ****weasel!â
I think this is because a squee comes from the heart. Itâs a primal thing. And geeks donât just like their fiction, they adore it. More than that I think we identify with it. For me, it is far more than just entertainment. I often hold fiction and the creators of said fiction up to my own moral standards and that can make me a tough audience.
But when I enjoy fiction, it feeds me in a deep way. Or it makes me feel warm and smile. Sometimes I actually feel it changing me as I read it and when that happens I want to share those good vibes.
I want to squee.
My name is Peter Newman and Iâve gone ten months since my last squee kill.
*Before alcohol only.